Friday, 3 February 2012

Wednesday, 1 February 2012

Did you know...

...That anal bleaching can be achieved in a DIY fashion by using toothpaste?


Neither did I until I spent the day waiting in for a delivery and was enlightened by the good women of Mumsnet.

Seriously! You couldn't make this shit up!

Monday, 30 January 2012

I spent most of today

Raking around in craft shops, dragging out the sewing machine and making pretty flowery things by cutting up other pretty flowery things and then sewing the pieces together in a different order. Yeah, me!
Proud owner of a large army of ninja squirrels and a detailed plan for world domination...


Hey Geppetto! I'm a real girl!

And now it's time to resume normal service, so I'm fetching a Bacardi and coke. 

Tomorrow I may have to kill something cute and small to re-balance the cosmos... Who knows. 

Monday, 23 January 2012


Not only am I going to try to keep this updated.

I'm going to move it to wordpress.

Behold the awesomeness!

Edit: Having mooched around the settings, maybe I can live with Blogger after all.

Suck it up, cupcakes!

Three years?

Wow! A whole three years since I so much as looked at this blog? Oh well. Never mind. A brief synopsis of the last three years then:

  • Went back to work
  • Bought lovely new car
  • Wrote off lovely new car
  • Left husband
  • Moved house
  • Bought a motorbike
  • Became an orphan 
That about sums it up really.
Anyway, onward and upward... I think I might try to keep this little fucker updated...

Stay awake bitches. ;)

Saturday, 3 January 2009

It’s Back! and Other Stories

Yay! The home of the porn hounds is back. I never thought I’d BassettHoundEarsmiss it that much. Why it disappeared, or what happened to make it reappear is anyone’s guess.

I’ve just spent 15 minutes of my day trying to find out the correct way to say “Go fuck a chicken!” in French, because somebody asked me. Now there’s 15 minutes that I will never get back. In case you’re interested, I think it’s “Vas faire foutre a la poulet”, but I wouldn’t want to bet on it.


Quote of the Day:
Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.

Tuesday, 23 December 2008

Merry Kissmas

Cats + Tree =

…Fucking Bedlam!!

cat treeWent to bed last night leaving a beautifully decorated tree, twinkling away in all it’s fibre optic glory.

Got up this morning to a horizontal tree, a bauble strewn carpet and two very innocent looking kittens.

Little fuckers!




Quote of the Day:
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
--George Carlin